What’s This? My Balls for your Dinner?
White River Sioux
Coyote was to come to Iktome’s house for dinner. There were two livers for dinner, but there wasn’t one for Iktome’s wife, which she wasn’t too happy about. Iktome went out hunting for more food, thinking that he might be able to rustle up some more grub, but he told his wife not to let Coyote do certain things, because he certainly would. One of those things was putting his hand up the wife’s dress.
Iktome left and the wife decided she was going to eat a piece of one of the livers, but then she ate the whole thing. Then she decided that she might as well go ahead and eat the other liver, now there was nothing for dinner.
Coyote showed up and was soon trying to take advantage of things. He even put his hands up the wife’s skirt, and other things. He asked the wife if he thought Iktome would mind, as they were such good friends, the wife said that Iktome would almost certainly mind. Coyote then asked where the meat for dinner was and the wife said she had not cooked it yet.
She told Coyote that they always had the balls of their guests for dinner. At first, Coyote thought this must be a joke, but the wife was serious. Coyote said he had to go out and pee first. Iktome soon came home. The wife told him never to invite Coyote again, because he was greedy and he had eaten up the two livers. Coyote was still running away from the house. Iktome ran after him screaming, “Leave one for me,” and Coyote yelled back, “If you catch me, you can have both of them.”
People certainly eat testicles from various animals, which seems kind of weird, but it happens. People don’t eat people testicles though. That’s just not something that happens, unless it’s some sort of weird serial killer thing going on.
The wife got the upper-hand here. She got to eat dinner, when none was left for her. She got her a little something-something from Coyote. She got to play a joke on both Coyote and her husband. She also made sure that Coyote wasn’t going to come back again. Iktome kind of deserved all of this for being such a jerk. Who doesn’t make sure the wife also has food. That’s kind of a jerk move, Iktome.
Guys can be a jerks sometimes, but start talking about cutting off penises and balls and see how fast they straighten up. It’s really not funny, but I don’t know, sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures.
The moral here is to make sure your wife has food too. She’ll scare your friends off and get the better deal in the process.
I bet this woman is fun to hang around.
If your spouse did this to you about dinner, what would you do?
Do you think both Coyote and Iktome got what they deserved?